Self-confidence while. I’ve struggled with self-esteem for as

Self-confidence relates to every aspect of our lives, yet so many of us struggle to find it.Self-confidence, or self-esteem, is how we value ourselves. We can see ourselves in either a positive or negative light. More often though, we depict all our flaws and break ourselves down into nothingness. We worry about what others might think about us. We blame ourselves for things that aren’t our fault. We lay out our weaknesses, but fail to see our strengths. We forget to be ourselves and try to become someone we’re not!This blog post has been sat gathering dust for a while. I’ve struggled with self-esteem for as long as I can remember. Over recent years, however, it had become increasingly worst. It led to heightened anxiety levels, to the point I couldn’t enjoy social situations anymore. I’d worry about what others thought of me, what they’d say behind my back, and I’d compare myself to everyone in the room – their pro’s against all my cons.It sounds ridiculous, how something that seems so insignificant could affect my life so much! But, because I was worrying SO much about what others thought of me, I’d put a lot of pressure on myself to change how I looked so I could be accepted. As a result, this led to an eating disorder, without me even realising it!It was an exhausting battle! I’d read a lot online about the perfect body, and I’d hear girls at school trying to lose weight that I questioned as to why I wasn’t also. I’d compare myself to models in magazines – you know, those photoshopped models and this slowly developed into an obsession. If I didn’t look like these women, or if I wasn’t skinny enough, then I felt nobody would like me. It damaged my confidence and food became a fear. An apple day may keep the doctor away, but eating nothing else did not! I’d also forgotten that I was an athlete, training every single day, burning calories and needed more fuel to keep my energy levels up. My body was crying out for nourishment.I was battling an unforgiving relationship. It wasn’t healthy and if I had carried on it would have only become a lot worst! A pinnacle point for me, however, was realising how it was affecting everyone else around me. When everything was laid out bare on the table, I couldn’t hide it anymore. I had to choose recovery with each new day. There were so many times when I just wanted to throw the towel in and give up because the fight seemed too much to handle. But fortunately, from seeking help, I had a very supportive network around me.We need to live our life to the fullest and this involves maintaining a balanced outlook on life. Firstly, you need to stop comparing yourself to others. When we compare ourselves to someone else, we pick out our flaws and compare them to the best things we know about them. Ask yourself this though, is that a fair comparison? In doing so, you’re only going to bring yourself down.Secondly, remember no two people are the same. We are all unique in our own ways. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not for the sake of being accepted by others. Champion the things that make you unique and find confidence in them. Focus on the positives and less on the negatives. Views failures as learning experiences. Learn from your mistakes and try again. Remember that it’s not over when you lose, it’s over when you quit.It’s not an easy journey to finding confidence, but it is not impossible! Learn to be kinder to yourself, accept your flaws and be less self-sabotaging. When you learn to give yourself some love, you’ll feel a lot happier about it.

x

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I'm Shane!

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